Which would avail you nothing, most likely, and this is by way of being my point: it may possibly ameliorate your fear to try to understand what an interaction between a human and a spider might be like from the spider's perspective.
I see spiders as biological robots, I don't feel the need to take on their perspective. I will scoop them up with a cup and notecard, but that's as much consideration as they're getting from me. My cat is a monster by way of comparison, and ruthless to any bugs who dare venture inside if I don't get to them first.
I think I understand why so many humans share this kind of attitude, explicitly or otherwise, but it's no less borne of culpable ignorance for that. I've made friendly acquaintance with wasps, and met spiders who proved smarter than some humans I've known, and there's nothing about those statements that should be surprising; the only reason it is, is because so few humans bother to pay any kind of real attention to the life with which we share this planet, and those few of us who do take an interest not purely motivated by selfish utility are regarded by the rest as creepy and weird.
Maybe if we took the time to get a little less bad at that, we'd get a little better at keeping healthy the ecosystems on which we also depend for survival. It's nice to think so, anyway, not that it matters; apparently it's much more important to us to go on thinking we're somehow special, privileged to dispose of all life on this planet and the planet entire as if we need never fear the slightest consequence. Hasn't this kind of foolishness already got us in enough trouble? Don't you think it'd be a good idea if we didn't keep it up and buy ourselves even more?
Now this is some top tier virtue signalling, good lord, get over yourself. Killing a couple bugs in your house is perfectly fine. Parent even tries to let them out and that's not even good enough for you because they might harm a goddamn bug.
Yep, the almost absurd level of anthropomorphism is borderline brobdingnagian. It's like he's living in his own insufferable version of charlotte's web.
Virtue signaling, hell - it's not as if I'm vegan, or even vegetarian; I value the lives of wasps and spiders, and couldn't give a damn about pigs or cows. Not a great fan of factory farming, but mainly because it's a blight on the landscape; it'll go on in any case whether or not I partake of the proceeds, so I see no reason not to get the benefit.
Everybody draws their own lines, is all, and this is one of mine.
It's hard to avoid the instinct to swat when something crawls or buzzes on you.
Not sure it's a species thing though. I wouldn't jump to murder but I might swat at an uninvited person I found spinning silk behind my washing machine.
