I use the holy hell out of stored procs and UDFs, and they have saved my bacon plenty of times.
Once you get past building todo lists, you'll end up with complicated transactions that do many different data mutations, usually along with some simple logic. You can either maintain your virtue and pay the latency price for each of those, or just code a proc that implements the whole thing. It might offend your software dogma, but it'll get shit done so you can get home to the wife in time for dinner. These days, that is the only deadline I care about.
Once you get past building todo lists, you'll end up with complicated transactions that do many different data mutations, usually along with some simple logic. You can either maintain your virtue and pay the latency price for each of those, or just code a proc that implements the whole thing. It might offend your software dogma, but it'll get shit done so you can get home to the wife in time for dinner. These days, that is the only deadline I care about.