I think it's not just friendship, it's a feeling of connectedness and community that comes from knowing people in your neighborhood and being known.
For five years I lived in a rundown SF unit with no laundry on site. Every week my wife and I would drop our clothes at a nearby family run wash and fold. Over years of little interactions we started to develop a semblance of friendship and real fondness for the owner. Twice a week I got a nice pleasant/personal experience, and that was from outsourcing a single chore.
I also use services like Sprig/Google Shopping Express/Amazon Prime, because they are awesome, convenient, and cheap. But as a result I rarely buy from the nearby corner store, and have not developed personal connections from any of these transactions. I have saved money and time, but it has cost me in social satisfaction. I'm not sure how I feel about that.
As you point out, there might be active interventions to try and replace this connection (e.g. volunteering), but the default has shifted from "get to know the people around you through transactions" to "receive goods and services anonymously."
> As you point out, there might be active interventions
> to try and replace this connection (e.g. volunteering),
> but the default has shifted from "get to know the people
> around you through transactions"
I grew up in (and recently bought a home in) a place where we were very close to our neighbors, but we were a mile or two away from the nearest retail stuff. I'm completely into the idea of "get to know the people around you" - it's actually the "through transactions" part that doesn't resonate with me!
In my head I'm like, "I shovel my neighbor's snow and build snow forts with their kids. Why would I need to be friends with the dude who works at the convenience store too? If I am, great, but it's not exactly a pressing need in order to form a connection with my surroundings..."
But I realize that's not everybody's situation. I have lived in places where neighbors didn't typically befriend each other. I definitely realize that friendly neighbors are a luxury. In my experiences, renters don't typically attempt to form friendships like homeowners do since renting is more of a transitory thing. And owning a home is definitely not advisable for everybody, nor attainable for everybody.
For five years I lived in a rundown SF unit with no laundry on site. Every week my wife and I would drop our clothes at a nearby family run wash and fold. Over years of little interactions we started to develop a semblance of friendship and real fondness for the owner. Twice a week I got a nice pleasant/personal experience, and that was from outsourcing a single chore.
I also use services like Sprig/Google Shopping Express/Amazon Prime, because they are awesome, convenient, and cheap. But as a result I rarely buy from the nearby corner store, and have not developed personal connections from any of these transactions. I have saved money and time, but it has cost me in social satisfaction. I'm not sure how I feel about that.
As you point out, there might be active interventions to try and replace this connection (e.g. volunteering), but the default has shifted from "get to know the people around you through transactions" to "receive goods and services anonymously."