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My comment may appear incredibly naive, I'm sorry about that.

But I wonder if this gray zone is not simply the symptom of massive loneliness.

I often say to friends that I'm surprised how much, when I'm in a relationship, I see all (other) women as men. Even when other women try to engage me into seduction play, it just makes me laugh or mocking them, just like I would with men (providing they know I'm with someone, of course, or else I try to be less rude).

This gray zone seems to me like people are incredibly lonely and craving for sexual activity, and I think we can spot that in our societies way beyond those "sexism at work" problems (the "dating" thing where you meet people you hardly know, "social" activities like facebook, etc).

It could be also a thing for people that are prone to cheat, but I can't think it's a majority of people.



This is a pet theory I've had but never bothered to research in detail.

In all honesty, what is the dating scene like in the SV? Are loads of guys still single, desperate, and oh-so-awkward in those sorts of situations? (in caricature , I am imagining me and my classmates in HS and Uni) I feel like that would help explain so much of what I read (obviously doesn't make it much better)


Fair enough assessment. This problem applies mostly to people not in a relationship.

Is that helpful? Lots of people are not in a relationship. Most of them would like that not to be the case.

Also, you can't tell just when meeting people whether or not they're in a relationship, so it's a problem regardless.


> Also, you can't tell just when meeting people whether or not they're in a relationship, so it's a problem regardless.

Well, you can if they're wearing a wedding ring.


Uh, that's not the same thing. Many (the majority?) of twenty something's who are in a relationship are not married.


Agreed, I was merely pointing out an edge case in the GP's generalization.




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