Agreed. The feeds I want to see blogging on is my RSS reader, not just constantly dumped onto social media feeds unless someone is explicitly bringing it up to talk about a post in general. If its just announcing a post exists, it feels spammy.
Finding external conversations about posts obviously is a bit more complicated but also if I actually care to see if discussion ever happened, I do so by searching the url. Something that linking via permashortlinks impairs.
1. I like your blog and subscribe to its RSS
2. I see new posts in my RSS reader with syndication links to (HN/reddit/twitter/etc).
3. I can go to those places to talk about it.
Low tech version is just linking to those discussions at the bottom of your post I guess.