> However real they may seem, your earliest treasured memories were probably implanted by seeing photos or hearing your parents’ stories about waiting in line for the spinning teacups.
Call me skeptical of this explanation.
As a small talk conversation starter, I've developed a habit of asking people what their earliest memory was.
For lots of people they don't have any memories from early childhood. I'd say the most common age I hear is around 5 or 6. The oldest I heard was a 30-year-old who doesn't remember anything before high school.
But when there are those early memories, they are short, strong, and associated with fear. But not consequential in the 'lore' that a parent would develop about a child.
One girl told me about a time when she was at a restaurant with her dad. He got up and left the booth, and she was scared to be alone.
Another story was about throwing a toy car and watching it puncture a soda can, which then began spraying, and being scared, not knowing what was going on.
A guy related a story to me about hearing their parents talk about being pregnant with their sibling (who is 2 years younger than them). And he distinctly remembers their emotions, their stress, and how it made him feel (scared).
It's not like the parents are telling their kids about that one time they got up for a few minutes in a restaurant or that one scary time a dog barked at them or that time they rode in a car with a cigarette smoker and the smell was disgusting.
They'll remember one sensory input like the image of a can spraying soda or the smell of smoke or the words someone said and then they'll remember, distinctly, the emotion. When they tell the story, you can tell they know exactly how they felt in the moment.
That just doesn't jive with saying they reconstructed those memories.
> But when there are those early memories, they are short, strong, and associated with fear.
Yep, although I'd expand that to any strong emotion. I have early memories of embarrassing moments and times when I had a lot of fun also.
But the first thing I can still remember was definitely fear, as it was of me drowning, at age... I want to say 3, but I'm not sure exactly when it was anymore, maybe it was 4. We were on vacation visiting my grandparents in another state, and were in their pool. I was to stay against the side 'cleaning the pool' by using a scrub brush and rubbing it on the ledge of the pool, and apparently at one point I didn't stick to the ledge, because I remember going under and swallowing some water and my parents noticing and coming to my rescue. I ate cheese and crackers at their table afterwards. He also had a golf cart and I remember driving that up and down the block.
That's pretty much it for that young. Next thing after that is while I was in pre-school, and I only remember a few things from that time.
And for anything earlier than like, high school, I don't have a lot more than just a few images I can mentally pull up of any given memory, and the knowledge of what happened on a kind of basic level (anything too detailed is pretty much gone now).
And if there are pictures that helps a lot. I can remember a few details not present in the pictures, but without the pictures I doubt I'd remember that happening at all.
I think this is true. And I recall reading that adrenaline helps form strong memories, which makes sense (best to remember your existential fear of tigers forever)
I was young, maybe 2nd grade, and the teacher pointedly ignored my raised hand. I ended up peeing in my chair. I remember it pretty well. :)
I also remember revisiting that 2nd grade classroom, and the room (and desks!) was MUCH smaller than I remember. My memories were from eyeballs closer to the ground looking around at a spacious room.
I also have a hobby of asking people what their earliest memory was.
My first memory is firmly datable to 10 days after my 3rd birthday. The assassination of John F. Kennedy was announced over the radio while I has sitting down with my mum at the kitchen table. Not a particularly traumatic memory. The response was surprisingly intellectual: something along the lines of "hmm the world is complicated", so not particularly traumatic. The memory has definitely never been externally re-implanted, but I sometimes wonder if it is a memory of a memory of a memory. It is nonetheless very vivid with lots of visual detail. There are a few other memories that are of events that occurred before my 4th birthday, but none that can be firmly dated.
I agree. In my experience, first memories dating to 5, 6 or 7 years old, or occasionally even later are pretty common; those dating to 3 or 4 years old, less common. I've never met anyone who has a memory that can be dated to before their 3rd birthday.
But the biggest challenge for almost everyone is attaching dates to early memories.
Call me skeptical of this explanation.
As a small talk conversation starter, I've developed a habit of asking people what their earliest memory was.
For lots of people they don't have any memories from early childhood. I'd say the most common age I hear is around 5 or 6. The oldest I heard was a 30-year-old who doesn't remember anything before high school.
But when there are those early memories, they are short, strong, and associated with fear. But not consequential in the 'lore' that a parent would develop about a child.
One girl told me about a time when she was at a restaurant with her dad. He got up and left the booth, and she was scared to be alone.
Another story was about throwing a toy car and watching it puncture a soda can, which then began spraying, and being scared, not knowing what was going on.
A guy related a story to me about hearing their parents talk about being pregnant with their sibling (who is 2 years younger than them). And he distinctly remembers their emotions, their stress, and how it made him feel (scared).
It's not like the parents are telling their kids about that one time they got up for a few minutes in a restaurant or that one scary time a dog barked at them or that time they rode in a car with a cigarette smoker and the smell was disgusting.
They'll remember one sensory input like the image of a can spraying soda or the smell of smoke or the words someone said and then they'll remember, distinctly, the emotion. When they tell the story, you can tell they know exactly how they felt in the moment.
That just doesn't jive with saying they reconstructed those memories.