Naw, us stumptowners don't mind y'all moving up here. Just don't be spreading lies about how great life in Portland is. Sucks up here, rains all the time, can't find a good cup of joe or pint of beer to save your life. Did I mention the rain?
oh, actually you're right. I forgot about all that. It does suck here, you all don't want to come here, too wet. Beer sucks so bad, no good food anywhere. Nothing to see here, carry on.
